I am as guilty as many other women. I was driven by wanting. Wanting a bigger house, nicer car and clothing - better things. This was how I was raised. I came from a middle class, NJ family. I was the youngest and only girl so I got it all. One pout and my daddy got me what I wanted. I remember crying over needing an outfit for my Barbie doll and daddy took me to the store to pick something out. Maybe he was doing it out of guilt that my mother died when I was young or this was his only way of showing his love to me. Anyhow, my husband was left to clean up this mess. He grew up as an only child. His parents didn’t have much so when he got something new – it was more than likely used from a yard sale. It’s funny how much we are defined by our upbringing.
Before getting sick, I spent the previous year or so simplifying my life. Or so I thought I was. Now I am faced with real simplifying – getting down to what really matters – the basics of life. It is an emotional realization. A part of you knows what you have to let go of yet the other part wants to keep holding on. It was easy to call the cable company and cut back to basic cable. It’s not so easy to call the broker and cash in the IRA’s that you thought you’d have when you retired. Once I make the call to shut off the phone number to my business line - then I know it is real.
When it gets down to survival then it’s getting a simpler life weather you want it or not. I asked God to help me a year ago to define a simpler life. Above is what I came up with.
It’s been hanging by my desk for quite some time now. I have worked on all of these areas of my life. Or so I thought. Oprah has dedicated entire weeks and episodes to this subject. Many people are feeling it right now. Maybe you are one of them. It doesn’t matter how much YOU want to simplify – your EGO still gets in the way.
I have hidden behind the stuff for way too long. When everything is striped away – what’s left is what really matters - my family, my friends, my health. Now that is simple.
I have a metal sign above my desk that says "simplify." One of my bff's bought it for me a few years back.
ReplyDeleteEven though we all have separate journeys, when our paths cross--there's a reason. I met Bob at one of the cons I went to, can't even remember which, then started reading his blog. I saw his post about your blog and have been praying for you since that day.
Your words here are a blessing.