Wednesday, May 20, 2009

What shoe are you?

If you had to compare yourself to a shoe – what shoe would you be? I heard someone describe their husband as a well worn loafer recently and it got me thinking. What shoe am I?

I would describe myself as a well worn sandal. I love sandals. They are comfortable and with a little heal they make your feet look pretty. My sandals are strappy and simple. I like ones that I’ve worn for a long time. However, the heels are a little worn out. They have scratches on them. They have dirt stuck on the bottom and may look as if they have been chewed on by a dog. One would think to buy a new pair and I have, but it was the exact same pair because I liked them so much. They were comfortable – what can I say.

Remember the expression “put yourself in my shoes” or “walk a mile in someone else’s shoes and you’ll really know where they are coming from”? Is it really possible to put yourself in someone else’s shoes or walk a mile in their shoes to know who they are, what they are feeling, where they are coming from? You might get an inkling of what they are feeling but you will never get the fullest extent of who they are and what they are experiencing – good or bad.

Time to get a new pair of shoes…

Wednesday, May 13, 2009


I was told recently that I haven’t been seeing signs. Funny enough, I have. However, for quite sometime I was blind to some signs that were in my face. Maybe you can call it denial, but they were there and I see them all very clearly now. Call it God, the Universe or Divine Intervention – whatever. I believe everything happens for a reason. It may be difficult to see when you are going through life changes but I believe God places people/signs/inner voice into our lives to guide us on our path.

For years, I have had moments where the little voice said “let --- go” but I chose to ignore it, hang on and fix. There was a moment that I was awoken out of bed at an ungodly hour by something bigger than myself in order to stop something from happening. To me that was a sign that this was meant to be. There were signs and stomach knotting that told me that certain people were not good, but I chose to ignore it. There were changed behaviors and things that should've clued me in. There were scrabble words that came up that should’ve warned me of deceit with someone. There was again that gut feeling and a conversation that should not have been ignored. Sometimes, we shut off to the signs that are right there in front of us. The ones we don’t want to see. The ones we deny. The ones that will hurt us.

Then there are other signs…like praying for help with something and the next thing you know someone is there or affirming your desire and a door opening with possibility. Needing help with insurance claims and someone out of the blue asking you if you need help with something like that. A doctor that you don’t normally see just happens to see you and also had the same disease. They are all signs – signs of a greater Power at work in our lives. Now we just need to not ignore the signs.

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Saturday, May 2, 2009


It has now been 6 months since I found out that I had cancer - Hodgkin’s Lymphoma to be exact. Early on I talked to many friends for words of wisdom, but one resonated to me more than I expected. She was very frank with me. She told me that I should thank Jesus for cancer and that I will be cleaning out all the garbage from my life and starting new. It wasn’t what I wanted to hear back then, but she was so right. I have a huge pile of garbage – one big piece in general - that I’ve cleaned out. I’m still not sure where to put it all – a dumpster would be nice. I do thank Jesus for cancer. This has given me a chance to know who people really are and who I really am.

My oncologist also told me I am cancer-free. He has no idea just how “cancer-free” I am. One final chemo treatment and some radiation to go, then new life begins.

“Trust is like a vase...once it's broken, though you can fix it the vase will never be same again.”

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