What is faith anyway? Why do people say “have faith”? I’ve tried having faith and it hasn’t gotten me anywhere. I’ve prayed and it hasn’t gotten me what I prayed for. All it has gotten me is a big mess and more than I can handle. Don’t you just love the phrase “God won’t give you more than you can handle?” Well, He has. And if He thinks He’s doing it because He loves me – I have to question that.
I’ve been through some crap in my life, but now I’m so far stuck in crap that I can’t even dig my way out. I’m just stuck in it. Stuck facing all the choices, decisions, actions and words that I’ve done over the years. I can’t take anything back. I can’t change what I have done to myself and to people I love. I’ve tried changing myself and finding faith to believe in - only to find myself at a crossroad in life wondering why. Why me? Why all of this at one time? Why?